Contact Me

Any time - drop me an email
miriamhendeles@gmail.com
1-323-243-7116

Contact Me

Any time - drop me an email
miriamhendeles@gmail.com
1-323-243-7116

[breadcrumbs]

Correct and Consistent

I struggle with consistency. No, I’m not talking about the consistency of the texture in a baked cake or potato kugel. Nor am I talking about the consistency of the mayonnaise as it is mashed inside tuna fish. (although I have trouble getting my tuna so perfectly mashed —and one of my daughters-in-law is  by contrast amazing at making very consistently mashed tuna fish sandwiches!)

But again, I digress!

The kind of consistency that I have trouble with, has more to do with my commitments to myself regarding habits and goals.

What in the world am I talking about? (you ask).

Continue reading


Letting Go of the Remote Control

An all-too familiar situation:

Here’s the scenario:  I see something going on in my surroundings – whether with my adult kids, or with a close friend, or even with a colleague at work.  I think about it a lot,  decide I know better, and make an assessment. A voice inside me says “stay out of it” but I don’t heed that voice. Another voice says, “help them, get involved, say something.”

Eeny meeny miney moe. Which voice to listen to? I listen to the second voice – the busybody one.

CLANG! I realize immediately that I shouldn’t have! Voice #1  inside me says, “you knew better than to get involved….”

Proactive or Reactive?

There is a new word the past decade or so: proactive. That refers to taking care of things ahead of time, planning for the future so that there is more chance of success.  Pushing the buttons on the Remote Control – the mechanism that thinks we can control and take care of everything in the world. We are going to save the day.

Proactive is a great thing. But usually “proactive” is for one’s own life. Not someone else’s life.

In fact, when one gets involved in someone else’s life, it often only complicates things for them —– and for us. It doesn’t help.

Shouting (to myself!) to Stop!

So when I read about people in books and periodicals who have dilemmas “should I or shouldn’t I?”…..I want to scream through the pages of the book, “DON’T!….. Stay out of it! It’s a train wreck!” But then again, I can’t tell them what to do. It’s their life to live (even if it’s just a fictional account in a book!).I think unless something is in a  life and death situation, or in a case of abuse or serious danger, OR if that person specifically asks for help (and even then it’s probably best to refer to professionals – a friend should never take the place of professionals), then it is best to stay out of it.

Prayer and relinquishing control:

Sometimes I really have to protect myself from places that I am not equipped to navigate the difficult waves.  Prayer always is a good thing. We can pray for the well-being of others, let G-d take over, relinquish control. And then give them love and encouragement.  And finally focus on the one place that we were given power to change: ourselves.


Positive Transformation

“What a Wonderful World” – A song recorded by Louis Armstrong (1968), and written by Bob Thiele and George David Weiss.

That’s how I feel right now. I feel positive, upbeat, and in a generally good mood about life.

I see trees of green…….. red roses too
I see em bloom….. for me and for you
And I think to myself…. what a wonderful world.

I see skies of blue….. clouds of white
Bright blessed days….dark sacred nights
And I think to myself …..what a wonderful world.

The colors of a rainbow…..so pretty ..in the sky
Are also on the faces…..of people ..going by
I see friends shaking hands…..sayin.. how do you do
They’re really sayin……I love you. Continue reading


Riding the Waves

Troubles. Tzores. (Hebrew). Problems. Issues. Many words have been used over the years to describe human suffering. Tonight at sundown marks the beginning of a nine-day stretch of enforced mourning  (no eating meat, no swimming for many, no music, or weddings) by the Jewish people for the 2nd Temple, which was destroyed 1,932 years go by the Romans. The Jewish people pray every day for the coming of the Messiah (Moshiach), when suffering will end, and the Holy Temple will be rebuilt.

In the meantime, how do we deal? (a new phrase I’ve picked up…). How do we cope with our suffering? Well, this week I took a drive to the Pacific Ocean with my family – about 12 miles from my home, and we watched the waves in the late afternoon before sundown. We breathed in the ocean air.

Continue reading


Just For Today

Ever make those promises to yourself to refrain from doing this or that for JUST one day? Well, today is the day I’m going to do that. Today is the day that I”m going to make a short list of things that I’m trying to do. Hey, I do that all the time – I make those “to-do” lists or those “to- not-do” lists….but today is the day I am posting this idea on my blog. And because of said posting, today is the day that I’m really really going to follow those lists. Right?

Right.

Yes, I’m convinced, confident and assured of myself today. (Hopefully this will last. But hey, we take what we get- one day at a time). Continue reading


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