Enjoyed this? Share it, and attribute it. Copyright 2014, Bubby Joys and Oys, M. Hendeles
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My two year old grandson loves to stand on his orange and yellow step stool.
He pushes the plastic stool over to a cabinet, steps on top of it and peers over the counter. He then comments on something he desires at the moment, or recites one of his newest vocabulary words while pointing to said item “up dere.” Some of his oratory includes words like “dis,” “cake,” “milk,” “cup,” or “Mommy, dat!”
Last week, on one such morning while his Mommy was preparing the other kids’ lunches at our house, when the little guy stepped onto his orange and yellow step, this grandmother (that would be me) walked by.
“Hey, Sweetie, could you just move over just a bit. Omi wants to get something from this cabinet?”
He stood there perched up on that stool and didn’t budge.
So, this grandma (me!) ever so gently moved his tiny body off the stepstool, moved the thing a tad, took out the item from the cabinet, put it on the counter and then set the stool back in his place.
“Here,” I said, “Now you can go back up.”
He stepped back up onto it, but not before his lips puckered up into a frown while he let out a roaring wail.
After a few minutes of soothing him, I got him to calm down and he became the happy babbly camper again. But I thought about the crying which I assume was because he was insulted and humiliated. I mean, he had been high up on his pedestal and I had the gall to take him down a notch.
This incident got me thinking about our relationships as adults and how this “taking someone down a step or rung” is hurtful to others. My husband tells a joke and I say the punch-line before he has a chance. Ouch.
A friend shares exciting news and I jump in with, “yea, I heard already.” What for?
Or my son tells a story at the table and someone (not saying who) corrects him on a detail.
It’s all about the kid and the stepstool. There really is no harm in allowing others to stay on their pedestal. It doesn’t hurt them and it doesn’t hurt you. Let it be. I try not to jump in to change or move things around. It can wait till later.
Maybe I could have waited till his mom had taken him out for the day to get that item out of the cabinet. Or asked his mom to move him.
No need to rain on another’s parade. Step out of the way so they can enjoy their fun in the sun.
Tags: adult relationships, child's self esteem, childhood development, raining on another's parade, sensitivity to others, toddlers